a Vision of Love

For all of the negative in this world - there is an infinite amount of positive. In my quest to return some sense of balance to the "spreading of news", I'm choosing to share the stories in my life that are the most positive. At least for today. :0)

My latest work with the PCRF children has supplied me with an abundance of smiles, gratitude and perspective - its given me a chance to see Life outside of my own struggles, wants and desires and through the eyes, hopes and dreams of those who start this great journey out with far less, but who sometimes give far more.

Meet Zain. She's 2 years old, from Gaza. She was born without eyes, and will sadly never see without a miracle. However, through the work of the PCRF and their teams of medical providers, Zain just received prosthetic eye lenses, even colored just like her mothers, so that she and her family can enjoy her life in as normal of a way as she can.

This little girl has stolen my heart completely. Because she cannot see, her sense of hearing is very developed and acute. She is a true music lover and I've often thought while watching her that I might be looking at the future's female version of Ray Charles. When she hears music, the rest of her world stops and she becomes fully engaged.

She also, not surprisingly, loves phones.

If you spent the day with her, you would mostly either see her swaying to the music (sometimes so faint in the background that no one else even notices) or holding a phone. Up until a few days ago one thing that I hadn't seen her do much was smile. Or laugh.




Until we put her on a swing.

I cannot tell you the last time I felt as happy as I did watching her on that swing - pushing her higher and higher and watching her sweet face react to the pull of gravity on her little tummy that resulted in recording worthy laughs and giggles.

Her little fingers clasped SO tight around the ropes that when it was time to go, I physically had to pull each of them off of the rope - one by one, much to her displeasure.

I'm not sure how much of Dubai I will remember when I leave and return to my life in the States, but one thing is for sure....this little girl is a vision of Love that I will never EVER forget.

(enter: Mariah Carey)


(Zain returned this morning to Gaza, complete with new prosthetic eyes and a glowing smile to match their twinkle - thank you, PCRF!)

Community. Love. Healing.

Since I've lived in Dubai, one thing that has been a constant complaint of mine is that I just don't feel like I "fit" here. In three long years, outside of my work family, I never really felt like I found my "group" here, and I very much need to feel a sense of community and oneness. Everything seems so shiny and brand new that you are constantly questioning its integrity, "soul" and sincerity. This has been at the core of my displeasure in living here.

Until now.

Even though I've been sponsoring a child of the PCRF for the last two years, there is nothing like getting personally, physically involved with a charity that you are passionate about. And I only "thought" I was passionate about these little guys before. Now, that I've touched one, hugged one, heard one laugh, seen a sweet little girl with one eye blow kisses goodbye to me and tell me in Arabic that she loves me.....I'm hooked. I feel like I have finally found the "community" of sincerity, integrity, "soul" that I was looking for. These people are not concerned with a life that revolves solely around themselves, their schedules, their own successes and finding ways to constantly get, more and look like "more". They are concerned with the lives of precious babies who have no way to take full care of themselves - not now as children, and without the organization, perhaps never even as adults.

To see the work that they are doing is beyond miraculous. Children come in with no legs and leave with two prosthetic legs. The little girl I visited yesterday came here with one eye that doesn't see at all and the other that has only partial sight. She will go home with a normal looking left eye and a right eye that has almost full sight.

Each year, the organization provides more than 150,000,000 USD of surgeries for children affected by the war in Gaza and they only need approximately 1,000,000 USD in order to fund this work. The money goes strictly to the transport and care of these children in hospitals around the world where the doctors are performing the surgeries pro bono.

This is why I say that Angels exist. I have now seen them with my own eyes.

Yesterday, after spending about 4 hours with little Lana and her mother, I walked away feeling THANKFUL that I was in Dubai so that I could know about this organization and have the opportunity to be apart of it. I felt THANKFUL for my eyes, my legs, my nose, my sight, my independence, my ability to run and play like a normal child, my ability to play the piano having had all of my limbs, fingers and toes. I walked away feeling "whole" again...and thankful for it. After becoming involved in a group that's sole interest is to heal those who cannot heal themselves, I found that not only did I see healing happening with these precious little children, but I felt it inside ME.

And that's the wonderful thing about Love and Community, isn't it? You get back what you give ten-fold.

Angels

When I was a little girl, I was weird (Ok, so maybe not that much has changed), but I was REALLY weird. For instance, I wouldn't eat grapes off of the vine because I didn't want to take them away from their "families". Single grapes were fine. Grapes on the vine cluster were SO not fine. In my free time, I used to sit outside watching the heavens for Jesus to come out of the clouds. And one of my most vivid memories was of my nightly prayer to God that He would let me see a real live angel in my lifetime. With my literal eyes...not my daydream eyes and not in my (clearly) very overactive imagination's eyes. I wanted to see one like David saw one in the Bible.

Thirty-odd years later, my whimsical hopes and beliefs in such things fell somewhere by the wayside. At some point, not only did I reject the belief itself, but even the desire for it at all. Sad, I know.

Lucky for me, God has a funny way of dealing with this type of attitude. He not only let me see an angel, He pretty much surrounded me with them. Non-stop Angels. Real Live Angels.

This week is the week of my mother's birthday. Three years ago, my mom became my full time angel (I won't tell you all of the reasons that I know this - you will think I'm even crazier than you already do). She definitely believed in angels, so its fitting that she became one. She knew I believed in them. She knew I wanted to see one in my life, and I think she also knew I needed a revived belief in them.

As I think about her this week, and all of the ways that I've been surrounded by her love and the love of my grandmothers, grandfathers and all of the other angels that now fill my life, I am in awe. And tonight, I sat in a room full of real live angels. As true and real as the word "Angel" can be.

More to come on those angels later...for now, I'm just thankful that even a 35-ish cynical misplacer of beliefs can see angels not only with figurative eyes, but with literal ones, and that in those eyes the belief can truly be held that Angels DEFINITELY do exist. I have proof.

Pic-a-Boo

Just a couple of pics today from my recent travels to Scotland. With my photography, I'm trying to spend more time in the shot and less time post-shoot in editing, etc. These were both shot with a 50mm fixed lens at f/1.4, no cropping, minor color touch ups and the removal of a worm eaten leaf on the little pink ones at the bottom. I'm absolutely loving the 50mm lens. Highly suggest it!

Holy Hotness

Its August 16th, which means that here in Dubai, we've passed the halfway "hump" of the Holy Month of Ramadan.

The word Ramadan is derived from an Arabic root R-M-Ḍ, as in words like "ramiḍa" or "ar-ramaḍ" denoting intense heat,[2] scorched ground and shortness of food rations.

Could the word be any more apropos?

To those of us coming from Western parts of the world who are not Muslim - this month feels like Hell on earth. Not only do most of the shops close during the daytime, as the daytime is a time for prayer and reading of the Q'uran, but because business slows to an absolute camels pace (and not a racing one), almost all restaurants are closed, you are not allowed to eat or drink or even be seen HOLDING a drink in public, bars close, there is no dancing, no loud music and no (or very little) alcohol is served.

We pretty much do our best to flee the country during this time.

For the past couple of years, I have literally dreaded this month, trying to scheme my way out of every extra day of leave, scheduling travel for work when possible, sick days, whatever necessary to be able to endure the boredom that compounds during the Holy month of Hotness, here in Dubai.

This year is no different. However, I've learned a couple of things about Ramadan that I actually now embrace and enjoy and I thought I'd share them with you, for those who are not familiar with this tradition of the Middle East.

1) The Iftars. "Iftar" is the time of day that the fast can be broken and in general the word references large feasts where food is shared. The time of the Iftar varies each day based on the exact time of the Sunset. Muslims are not allowed to eat one bite of food until the sun has set past the horizon line completely. In fact, it has been made a rule here that for Muslims residing at the top of the Burj Khalifa (the tallest building in the world), they must not break their fast for 1 - 2 minutes later than those who reside closer to the ground because the building is so high they can see the sun for a couple of minutes longer.

How do you say "Crazy" in Arabic?

Traditionally, the Date is the first food to be eaten to break the fast and the "breaking of the fast" is to be done together...with family and friends. Many people gather in large groups either at each other's homes where a true feast has been prepared, or they join together in restaurants with Iftar buffets guaranteed to put the pounds on you faster than you can say "Inshallah". Think Thanksgiving dinner for 30 straight days. Its amazing. This is a part of Ramadan that I can say that I truly enjoy. Just check my waistline. You have to take care, however, that you let the Muslims who are fasting pass through the Iftar line before you do, as there is a frenzy at the buffet that has left me wishing I had wrapped my fingers in bacon for fear that they would otherwise be eaten right off of my hand. Definitely an experience not to be missed.

2) Shortened Work Days. It is common that businesses close at 2:30 each day throughout the Holy Month due to the fact that its Muslim employees are generally fasting and therefore not able to keep their strength up for a normal workday. Chris, for instance, gets off of work at 1:30 each day for the entire month of Ramadan. With normal pay.

3) The Spiritual aspect. Ok, so maybe I don't wear Abaya and Hijab, nor have I ever opened the Q'uran, but I can appreciate a person's dedication to their religion. Its admirable to see people sacrificing their personal enjoyment and comfort for something greater, even if its not MY "something Greater". The mosques, as well, are beautifully decorated during this month, covered in lights drawing people into it's prayer halls for daily readings and prayer time together. It's quite a sight to behold.

So, the Holy Month has its benefits and beauty. It might not be something I look forward to personally, but I can appreciate the warmth in the intention and faith. Even if I'm sweating my way through the Iftar buffet.

(photos by others)

the Faces of War

WARNING: Disturbing images follow

This morning I opened the news to see yet another attack on Israel. A war that seems to have no end. No boundaries that are enough. No lines that can be removed or shared. No negotiation that can be agreed by all parties. Let me make it clear that I don't stand on either side of the line. I stand ON the line. The line where "enough" is drawn.

I am on the side of the innocent victims that get brought into and destroyed by this war without a choice.

These victims.

Before I came to Dubai, I have to admit that I had really not paid close attention to the details of the Palestinian/Israel war. Living in the US means seeing a fairly biased view of the conflict and as I always take the stance of Peace no matter what or whose battle is at play, I did not get involved. I wanted to keep my knowledge at an "ignorance is bliss" level. This meant I would not have to be subject to the opinionated views of one side or the other.

This meant I would never have to see faces like these.

Living here in Dubai means conversations about this war are a part of your everyday life. One Saturday morning, while enjoying breakfast, the breath was knocked out of me when I saw this image in the daily newspaper. I was catapulted into "involvement" by the literal horror of what I saw.

Where war (of any kind and for any reason) is concerned, I will always take a stand of Peace. But not for the sake of who is right or wrong. And not only for the sake of Peace itself (albeit a good enough reason). The stand I take now is for these precious little lives that are literally being destroyed by this war.

I have not chosen "this" war because it means something particularly special to me. I hate them all equally. I love people equally and I would move to protect children equally and unconditionally. These children mean something special to me. I don't know them and I don't need to know them. I don't know what their parents think about the war, what their opinion is and what "side" they are on. It doesn't matter to me. All I need to know is that "this" - these faces - this sacrifice of youth and innocence is wrong on all sides.

These are the faces of War. The ones we don't want to see. The ones that we pretend don't exist. The ones that are too hard to stare into. The ones that we don't want to admit we helped create.

Innocent. Destroyed. Sacrificed faces and lives. Sacrificed for the lines that we, as adults, choose to draw and reinforce. And fight for. This is the cost of our opinions, our egos and our unwillingness to bend.

Today there will be two year olds in surgery hanging on to their barely begun lives because we cannot and will not MAKE A CHOICE to agree. We could even agree to disagree. In Peace. Without bombs and missiles and tanks and guns. With our families, limbs, homes and futures in tact. And maybe even some understanding and perspective.

I have chosen to sponsor some of these innocent lives in their pursuit for some sense of normalcy and health, after what has been stolen from them. It doesn't matter if it wasn't "on purpose". It doesn't matter for what cause/reason/promise this has happened.

Only these little eyes matter. The precious little hands that will never again hold the way that they were designed to - these hands matter. Tiny little legs that no longer exist to carry them on their own missions in life - prosthetic legs now matter. The ones who lost their families and have lingering mental and psychological trauma - those future minds now matter.

If you're interested in helping in any way, I have chosen to sponsor this particular organization, but there are many others like this one that are taking these children (from both sides of the line) and helping to restore what they have lost.

www.pcrf.net

Here are some others...

http://www.warchild.org

http://thechildrenofwar.org

http://www.globalchild.org/

http://www.invisiblechildren.com/

But bigger than this....we can help these children have a future by laying down our internal weapons. The weapons that manifest themselves as tears, pain and struggle on these tiny precious faces.

Friendspiration

As an artist, one thing that is the lifeblood for me is staying inspired. This can come through various mediums, such as music, color, motivating words, seeing a child playing, down to the even less obvious things...like humility, vulnerability and just good ole fashion hard work. For me, however, nothing inspires me quite like the love of my friends. Especially when you have friends like mine.

Since this blog is dedicated mostly to that which describes my life in Dubai, I'm only going to share the inspiration that has come with the friends that I have met here in the Middle East, starting with my very first Dubai friend, Reiner Erlings.

To say "nice" things about this guy would be patronizing at the least. To say he's genius, an understatement. To say that he inspires me...well, that might come close, but not quite. But it's a start.

Reiner and I met during one of my first weeks here at the launch of his newest album to be produced here in Dubai for singer, Jonas Desai. We became instant friends. The reason for that connection wouldn't be realized until much later on, but the important part was that it was made at all, and unlike some of my other "connections" in Dubai, this one really stuck.

At the time that I met Reiner, I was supposed to be writing online articles for Spin magazine, and meeting Reiner felt like hitting a gold mine, as he is one of the only and foremost music producers local to Dubai. Not only a Producer, he's also a Songwriter, multi-instrumentalist, Film/TV Scorer and orchestral composer. He does everything from composition and sound design for award-winning ad campaigns, scores for films, documentaries, features and shorts by acclaimed filmmakers, some of the most creative musicians from the Middle East, composition and arrangements for the UAE Philharmonic Orchestra to a number of internationally acclaimed artists, from Flo Rida, Snoop Dogg, to Lumidee & Sean Kingston.

"Awesome" doesn't cut it.

Immediately, I made a point of adding him to my "to do" list which meant interviewing him and meeting some of the artists that he was producing. Much to my luck, this warranted time in the studio with him, even during album rehearsals and recordings.

The funny thing about music producers is that their work and "art" rarely get seen to the full extent. Of course the musicians themselves get to see it and know it for the creative genius that it is, but all too often we take a song to be more about the musicians and less about the production of the music, when the production really is SO important and special. I, thankfully, got a chance to be inspired by that of Reiner's.

A happy addition to being in the studio with him during production, meant meeting and befriending one of his clients, Gayathri Krishnan, who has since become one of my closest friends here in Dubai.

Shortly after meeting her, the two of them began dating and I cannot tell you the explosion of creativity that happens when two musicians with opposite personalities come together to make music. They are absolutely STUNNING as individuals, but as a couple, they will knock your socks off.

Reiner produced Gayathri's first full length album, Disengage (title single can be heard here), which really put her on the map here in Dubai and abroad. Together, they are currently working on what I believe to be THE most creative musical project yet to be seen in the UAE, called Movement. Think of it as the symphony meets the underground. A collaboration of live visual artists, dancers, musicians and a full 24 person choir with Gayathri and Reiner writing and composing the entire production. To say the least, its an extraordinary project and one that I personally cannot wait to see come to fruition.

What inspires me most about the two of them is their dedication to their dreams. Reiner has a degree in business and was never formally trained in music. He doesn't even read musical notes on paper and yet has created his dream-career out of a passion and commitment to music that is all his own. He couples that talent with more humility and kindness than anyone I know here and keeps his feet firmly on the ground while enjoying his flight to stardom. Gayathri is a music machine. Plain and simple. She never stops going, moving, creating, brainstorming for ideas and then backs them up with the follow through that I personally find to be the most inspirational thing of all. She believes in her dreams and fights for them. Every single day.

These are the people that flank my social life here in Dubai. A day doesn't pass that I don't thank my lucky stars for being granted the gift of having the two of them as friends...and constant, constant inspiration.